Thursday, April 30, 2009

Morning madness

Another thursday dawned ... the alarm went off at sharp 5:30am. I snuggled in my comforter and hugged BP to latch on the last few minutes of sleep. Within 5 minutes we both were up and headed to get our chores done. I took my shower and came down to see Junior in BP's arms. He trying hard to feed her the milk and she refusing it. I continued to add on spices to the boiling water he had kept for our morning tea. We had our tea and he rushed upstairs to get dressed to work.
I prepared breakfast (poha), packed 3 lunch dabbas for BP, Cantaloupe and self, set the cooker for rice and dal, prepared fresh coffee decoction and was cutting the apples for Cantaloupe's lunch when I heard her voice. Meanwhile BP came down and left for work. I went upstairs to find Cantaloupe awake and wanted to play with Junior on her bed. The little was only too eager to oblige. Good... I can prepare rasam I thought and headed back to the kitchen. I could hear the girls having a good time. 10 mins later I went upstairs ... Junior jumped at me indicating she was done playing there and I asked Cantaloupe to come downstairs. We turned on some nursery rhymes and were singing and dancing for some time. I looked at the clock and it was close to 8'o clock. I asked Cantaloupe to rush to the bathroom so we were not late. Thats when everything started going wrong.
First she reminded me that she had not studied in the morning. (we usually sit together and study / pray for 15 mins in the morning). I was kind of worried we'd be late to school, but couldn't refuse her because afterall she wanted to "STUDY" :) She took her own sweet time to write the alphabets pausing every now and then to play with Junior and just look around or yawn. I was getting irritated by every second she was wasting but tried to be patient with her. It was around 8:20 and she was finally done. Good ! Now come on ... lets go for the bath I said. I am sleepy ... can I sleep? She asked. I knew she had her mind set on sleep .. How long? I asked ... Just 1 minute she assured me. I put the breakfast in a bowl and heated her milk and returned back and ordered her to go to the bathroom immediately. But I want to sleep for some more time she tried arguing.
Fine, I will get dressed and then take you to school in exactly the same state that you are in I said calmly. She thought I was kidding and didn't take me seriously.
2 minutes later I declared, I am done ironing my clothes, if I don't see you in the bathroom now, you will not get a bath. Perhaps it was my tone that made the difference and she went to the bathroom. I bathed her and out she came for a new tantrum. I don't want you to pick my clothes... I want to pick it. I said, its already picked and if you don't want to wear these, you get another to wear. She did not protest much.
She said her prayer and I gave her milk. She tried to be extra sweet and requested , Amma can I have my TV while eating breakfast. (she is allowed about 10 mins of TV during breakfast during which time I feed Junior and get dressed to work) It was already 8:45 ... I looked at the clock and said, sweetie you have about 5 mins for breakfast, I can feed you today if you want. But you don't get TV.
She was very very upset with the proposal on hand and yelled out. I could care less and continued to feed Junior. She repeatedly asked me to turn on the TV and I continued to ignore her. There is about 3 mins left I warned her ... if you don't eat now, you will not get any breakfast today. I don't want breakfast, I don't want lunch , I don't want to eat anything today ... she shouted back. Fine I said, and pretended to pull out the lunch box from her bag. She realised that I was going to have none of her gimmicks today. I want my lunch ... I will be hungry amma ... please keep the green apples for me. Her voice had gotten much softer now and she seemed more calm.
As I changed to my office wear, put on your socks and shoes before I am done, else you will go bare foot to school I announced. I heard no protest but she was crying by now. I picked my office bag to see her ready ... but she continues to cry. I asked Do you want me to clean your face or you want to tell today's story to your friends at school? Please clean me up, she requested.
We drove to school ... we were late by about 4 minutes. She apologised multiple times on the way to school for her bad behavior. Do you want to have some breakfast now I asked ... Yes amma .. she said. I immediately fed her few spoons of Poha (I would have never been able to eat in peace if she had refused her breakfast and I was damn hungry :( ) I waived her good bye and drove to work.

Most days are not so bad ... Cantaloupe understands her routine and likes her school. But to get her ready on time is somewhat a challenge ... but today was exceptionally bad. Most times I would have yelled at her for her bad behaviour ... it started out the same today as well ... but soon I took a different approach to deal with her. I think this "Non yelling" method is much better than the other one ... only I need to be consistent with it.

3 comments:

Just a grail said...

I agree that the non yelling method is the best, sometimes though, in a moment of frustration it is hard to remember that!

Pixie said...

hugs!

Things will get better and non-yelling always works best... :)

Rohini said...

Wow! Your mornings sound chaotic. I complain so much and I have one child and someone to do the cooking!!!

 

My circle of life with BP, Cantaloupe and Junior and much more | Desenvolvido por EMPORIUM DIGITAL