Monday, September 14, 2009

Moderated Words

The other day I was lazing around with my laptop keeping an eye on Cantaloupe who was playing with her toys. Cantaloupe used the word 'F***' and I was startled ... thankfully I didn't react. Then I followed her more closely and understood what she was doing. She was pretending to be a magician and was apparently saying a magic code "Fallammboo ... Footuta ... Filliata ... F***"
She went ahead and pointed each of her doll to be representing each of the magic words.

I somehow felt uncomfortable with her usage of the word and asked her to not use the word. As expected she asked me why she couldn't use it ... I mumbled something on the lines of it being a meaningless word and there were other words famously used by magicians like "Abracadabra Allaka Zoo" and that she could use those. May be she was too involved in her game to question me further and continued with her game.

What do you guys do when you hear your child speaking words not meant for their age? Do you disapprove of the usage immediately or you don't make a big deal out of it and leave it there hoping they will forget the word.


Pixie said...


Sorry CA, I'm not being of much help here!

but, she is being so cute!! ;)

Maybe, you could gently tell her that it's a bad word? Not too sure really.

Poppy said...

No idea. Am stumped. Dunno how I would react - am of no help here na?

noon said...

Hi CA - I think your reaction was best. I think in those situations it is best to suggest something more appealing and kind of ignore - the more you focus on it, they more curious they are about it - they may use it then when you are not around. Even KB - though he is only four - since he is now reading fairy tales etc - he is so into magical powers and "kill" and "dead" and what not - even from stories like Pinnochio or Jungle book where Shere Khan "attacks" etc...sometimes it is a bit awkward - he was at the park with a friend's son and they were playing - when suddenly the other kid was out of sight at another slide and KB told his mom - your brother (I think he meant son since he thinks of himself as "brother") died and went to heaven...and then he said - oh there he is - he came back from heaven! I mean - it is really awkward - but if I make a big deal about it - am sure he will repeat it again...of course if it gets to be often, then you can't ignore those kind of words...gets more complicated. Hopefully it won't get to that. But wonder where CA heard that word kids her age use that word in school?

Cantaloupes.Amma (CA) said...

@Pixie: Telling its a bad word will increase her curiousity :(

@Poppy: I was stumped too ... took a few seconds to realise the context

@Noon: Yes .. it is awkward Noonie ... and I agree not making a big deal is the best approach knowing very well that their curious mind will register the word if given importance.
As far as I know Cantaloupe didn't really attach any meaning to the word ... she was just trying to make up her own words and ended up making an inappropriate word.

G said...

Hey! First time on your blog. came here from Usha's. None of my business but you seem to have missed out adding 'junior' in the 'View my complete profile' description. Do add.
Nice read, btw.

Cantaloupes.Amma (CA) said...

@G: There ... modified the description ... Junior is family and needs to be present there !
Thanks for pointing out.

sraikh said...

Neil used to pronunce truck that way. and Samar pronunces fork that way as well..

I just ignore it.

But with the girls, I have said, there are some words people use which mean bad things and you shouldnt use it. They are for adults only, just like beer. They think sala is another name just like pappu. :)

Aryan said...

How Cantoloupe heard that word??? Your response was good.....I guess deviating them is the best option.

Shobana said...

I think not making a big deal is good, but I don't do it. I immedietly launch into a scolding session (I know, I know). Sometimes too, when I just let it go, Naren, keeps repeating it over and over, until I react. So I would think, it is best to analyse the situation and deal with it...not much of a help there, was I??

Lakshmi said...

With S, a simple direction of "It is not a good word, do not use it", worked when she was 3-4 years old. Now this past year(she is 5 now), she questions. But she is not grown up enough to understand the explanation and at the same time just does not want to obey blindly. At this point ignorance is working better for us :)

Lakshmi said...

I meant ignoring(not ignorance)!!, you get the point :)

Cantaloupes.Amma (CA) said...

@Sunita: LOL on truck :) Your girls are old enough to understand I guess ... ignoring / diverting best works for me :)

@Aryan's mom: I don't think she has heard the word ... she was just trying to make up her own magical words.

@Shobana: Not making a big deal is very essential I think ... but then I need to control my natural reaction ... thankfully its the first and only time this has happened.

@Lakshmi: Totally ignoring uh? But then if she uses them in front of others doesn't it get embarassing? (though kids may forget it soon) ... diversion seems to be working in my case :)


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