Monday, February 2, 2009

Equal Responsibility

The weekend was rather nice ... bright, sunny and warm after those cold days. Post lunch we went out for a walk. We had to return the borrowed DVDs as well. (Watched Oye Lucky ... nicely made movie) Cantaloupe chose to put on her skates. (bad choice) The moment we were out of our apartment complex, she wanted them out ... but her dad ignored her tantrums and continued to hold her, while she skated. I was only to happy to push the stroller and enjoy the sun. Junior was just glad to be out of the house.
On our way back, we went to the library, where we met one of BP's good friends. (we were meeting this couple after 5+ years ... and they were coming to our current house for the first time.) They have a son and I generally asked the boy how old he was .... he was initially shy and later said four ... and his father smiled. He was a little shorter than Cantaloupe and was very shy and talked little. Cantaloupe was excited to have company in playing and willingly led the way home.
Once we reached home, the little boy and Cantaloupe got busy playing and I settled down to talk to the mom while feeding Junior her snack. As is the case most of these days, I asked her opinion on Public schools and if she intended moving the boy from the Montessori he is going to a public school this year. She said, he still has sometime ... I was rather confused. (Public school applications are being distributed in the neighborhood right now and anyone willing to change should have known the same). As we got talking, I learnt that the boy had turned 3 just few days back ...uh??? (So why didn't the father correct the boy earlier ??? I thought)
Junior needed diaper change and BP took her inside to do the needful. The boy's mom was rather surprised / pleased to see that. BP changes diapers?? she asked. Oh yeah .. he does I responded. In 3+ years, the boy's father has not changed a single diaper she said. If I am at a mall or some place away from home and his diaper needs to be changed, he calls me up ... I rush home and change the diapers ... she continued. You are lucky she concluded. Her husband also shamelessly admitted that he had no clue which school the child went to OR which public school he'd be going to next year. He just said mom will take care of everything.
BP and I looked at each other ... BP beaming with pride for the compliment the lady just showered on him ... and me proud to have him as my husband.

Later BP told me that his friend is one of the best engineers he has ever come across ... has very high reputation in office. But I pointed out that, it was rather sad that he was not an involved dad.

Seriously ... aren't dads and moms equally responsible for their kids? Isn't changing diapers one of many things they are responsible for?

3 comments:

Pixie said...

Yes.. I totally agree... the responsibilies are equal...
But, it's sad that there are a lot of men like your husband's friend... they proudly say that they haven't changed diapers or taken care of the kids... it's shocking, but true...

Emaan said...

ya.. my mommy totally agrees with this post.. wish dad read it too and helped mommy a bit as well..
nice blog :-)

mnamma said...

I agree CA that the reponsibilities are equal but it is always the Mom who does most of the work in child rearing particularly in a society like ours - it is looked down upon, if Dads changes diapers or in general help out. But things are changing.

 

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