Day care story

Cantaloupe has been going to day care since she was 5 months. She has been a very accommodative child and has always enjoyed her day care stay. Infact some of her best pals are are from her day care she previously went to. Even though she gets to meet her old friends rarely, its amazing to see how they bond instantly.
But this April, I invited my parents to come over and spend some time with us. The idea was for Cantaloupe to bond with her grand parents. We extended the same invitation to BP's mother as well, but she wasn't very keen. My parents accepted the invitation after much deliberation ... afterall they could not resist the idea of spending time with their only grand daughter. Also, Cantaloupe was growing fast and we figured this was her only chance for a break from school ... she could be pampered lot by her grand parents.
So, May 2007, we stopped sending Cantaloupe to the day care. She made it so much easy on my parents by bonding with them instantly. (note: She had met them only once before ... and that for a very short span of 5 days). My parents booked their return tickets before they arrived and had informed us that they would go back in September. So we had booked the day care from September.
Cantaloupe started pre-school this week. We expected her to cling to us and throw all tantrums the first few days of her day care. Afterall she had got used to a different style ... but that was not to be. She made us proud by waving a cheerful goodbye on the first day. I cried in the car driving back home ... afterall it was the start of school for her and she would be in school for the next 20 something years on her life !! I will cherish that moment for the rest of my life... her cheerful face is stamped in my memory for ever.
The mother in me, could not wait till the end of day to pick her up. I ended up going to the pre-school quite early ... there she was ... again welcoming me with a warm hug and her best smile. The next 2 days was the same ...
But yesterday when I went to pick her up, she was being pulled to one of the corners and the teacher was saying something to her in a stern voice. Cantaloupe was sad ... her smile was missing ... her head bent ... and was ready to burst to tears. As soon as she saw me, she could no longer control her emotions and started crying profusely ... the sight of my baby crying so hard brought tears in me too, though I tried hard to control my emotions. The teacher came to me and started complaining about Cantaloupe.
She said, that Cantaloupe had not been paying attention to anything said in the class, had not helped in cleaning up the toys, had not slept well ... was very excited with other kids and had pushed them etc etc ... the teacher blabbered non stop for the next few mins. All the while, Cantaloupe kept crying. I looked at Cantaloupe and asked her to say Sorry which she did. I told the teacher I would talk to her about it.
The ride back home was very upsetting to say the least ... the teachers words were circling in my head and I didn't know what to do ... I think I was humiliated / upset / shocked all at the same time. I yelled at my baby for all the things that the teacher had pointed out :( All the while Cantaloupe kept quiet and requested to be fed something.
Its a routine for me to carry some snack when I go to pick up Cantaloupe. She is hungry and tired in the evening and is ready to eat anything that I have to offer. No fuss .. no mess time ... anything I give her she will gladly eat.
But yesterday on our drive back, I didn't give her anything to eat for quite sometime ... just kept repeating my moral lessons. Then I realised how hungry she could be and gave her the box of Mangoes and Watermelon I had carried. Cantaloupe greedily ate ...
By the time I reached home, I was more calm ... I looked into Cantaloupe's eye and this was our conversation:
Me: Why did you not sleep?
C: Because I couldn't
Me: (to myself): What would I do, if I couldn't sleep ... of course I would get up from my bed
Me: Why did not listen to the instruction the teacher told you
C: Because I already knew what she had said .. she kept saying the same things
Me:(to myself): Well ... she must learn some patience
Me: Why did you hug ABC?
C: Because she is my friend
Me: But you cannot hug her ... you have to talk to her from a distance. Did you push her?
C: She doesn't like me hugging? I didn't push her ... I was just trying to play with her !
Me:(to myself): Cantaloupe can be wild while expressing her affection ... she must learn to be gentle.

I explained to her that it was not OK to hug her friends and that she had to be patient and listen to the instructions her teacher had to give.
When I opened her lunch box, I found that he had not eaten anything ... my child was hungry and thats the reason she was perhaps restless. While the teacher noticed her restlessness, she had not noted that she was talking to a hungry child. Don't get me wrong, there are definitely some things that Cantaloupe has to learn like being more patient ... but then what would you expect from a hungry starving child?

Gifting rules

I am very upset today about the gift I received.

Parents are just back from their East Coast trip. They visited atleast 5 cousins of mine during their trip. Before they left for their trip, we had marathon shopping sessions buying gifts for everyone. One of the cousins had a baby just a week back and I was very particular about what I wanted to gift the new parents. I was sure about buying something which they would certainly use. Likewise, for all other cousins too, I handpicked items which I was certain they would use. (had got clues about their choice of items during our conversations).

My parents got back yesterday and passed on the gift the said new parents had sent for Cantaloupe. It was a Dora night dress. The material is pathetic .... the color is horrible (really wonder if any one buys such colors) .... I could go on and on ... in plain sentence, "It is an Insult in the name of gift".

I am upset. I know this cousin of mine .... she is very very particular in her clothing, items she buys for herself, home decoration etc. I lived with her for almost a year and I have seen her selections ... they are very tasteful. My mom also mentioned that she has furnished her house beautifully and has bought items from all over the globe to decorate her home. Why then did she pick that stupid night dress for my kid ? If she didn't gift me anything, it could have bothered me least. But why gift something as horrible and say "We handpicked it for Cantaloupe" ... handpicked... ?????????

Here is something I would like to establish about gifting (I know the said cousin is not reading my blog)

1. Do NOT gift anyone unless you really want to. Just don't gift something for the purpose of it and to show off with others that you have gifted.
2. Gift something that you would use if someone gifted the same item to you. (I would not even donate things to unaffordable people, the items / clothes are in good condition. The reason I may be donating would be that I no longer use those items)

Better NOT gifting, than gifting crappy items and insulting the receiver.

Cycling queen

One of my most priced possession has been my BSA SLR ... MY bicycle !! I learnt cycling during summer vacation before I entered 5th grade. My parents allowed me to bicycle to school which was a good 5 kms from our house since my 5th grade. I learnt a lot of tricks on my bicycle and mastered the art of manouvering it admist traffic. I proudly bicycled the next 8 hrs till I entered Engineering.... which is when I was gifted my "Scooty".

Anyways, this blog is not about my bicycle ... its about Cantaloupes' bicycling. We bought a bicycle to her on her 2nd birthday. When we bought it, we knew it was a size bigger than her tiny legs could handle. Initial few months, she dismissed the idea of even sitting on it ... much to our disappointment. We reasoned, it could be her uncomfortable feeling on hanging her legs in the air. But soon, her legs were able to touch the peddle ... but she continued to resist sitting on it. That's when BP realised that his daughter needed a good amount of encouragement before she would start bicycling. By then she had turned 2.5 yrs .... May be it was coincidence ... but most other kids around us seem to cycle comfortably and we were left guessing what age the child might have began cycling.
BP then claimed (it was almost that I challenged) that he would ensure Cantaloupe was cycling by her 3rd birthday. The initial few weeks were difficult with Cantaloupe refusing to even come anywhere close to the bicycle ... we just couldn't understand what her fears were. Gradually, she started liking the idea of just sitting on it with her legs on the peddle, while her parents pushed it. It was our evening routine to go for a walk like this for almost couple of months. Then I changed my projects and could not get time to go on these walks because of work ... BP and cantaloupe though continued this routine.
One fine day, BP and Cantaloupe surprised me, when I saw my little daughter bicycling on her own. I felt so proud of her ... I know most kids can bicycle ... it may not be a big deal ... but for me it was afterall my daughter ... all thoughts of my association with my BSA SLR kicked in and a tear escaped from my eyes !
These days Cantaloupe loves the time she spends on her bicycle ... infact she eagerly waits for her dad to take her out for cycling. She goes out on his, while she on hers ... I have another bike too ... we are planning to go on a cycling picnic soon, with all three on our bikes ! That sure sounds fun to me :)

Mother -Daughter Evening Routine ...

Our evenings are pretty much the same everyday ... Cantaloupe keeps looking forward to this part of the day when she is only point of attention ... well wait since my parents are visiting us now, she has been getting constant attention through out the day. Anyways, I get a warm reception these days when I come back from work.
Cantaloupe is neatly dressed, is all cheerful and in her best mood. She tells me, she has been waiting for her mommy... thats me... and guess why?? We read together atleast 5 books continously. Yes ... I am not even allowed to change and refresh ... the moment I enter the house, Cantaloupe brings the chosen set of books for the day... drags me to the recliner and sits besides me and demands I read the book. One look at her, and she immediately gives me a warm hug and I melt down immediately. I forget my tiredness and I am ready to spend time with my daughter. Of course, my parents get worried about their daughter not getting a moment of rest ... but thats a different story.
Our reading is as dramatic as I can imagine ... with hand movements, jumps, running around, voice modulations etc... its actually quite an entertainment to my parents as well. Of course, they get to see their daughter playing a mommy ... which they sometimes find it hard to believe even now.
By the time I am done reading the first 2 books, my mom brings me fresh snacks / fruits every day. Even with her back problems, she ensures that she prepares my favourite snacks almost daily. Yum Yum .... Cantaloupe and I share the evening snacks.
Now, we are energised enough to dance to some foot tapping numbers. Sometimes, I have to take evening conference calls and she is not happy at all. We have found a way out ... the evenings I have conference calls, my parents take her out for an evening stroll. By the time they come back from their evening walk, I am done with the call. And daughter and I are ready for some more time ... this time its either a project with Foam stickers or a painting project or some singing or revision of her alphabets or reading books again or story telling.
One thing I know for sure is, we have made a nice routine and both enjoy our evenings ... make the most of it !!